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Nominated by the Dog Writers Association of America as best humor book of 2011!
#1 on Amazon's List of Hot New Releases!
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"Show Dog Sings the Blues is a silly, exciting, touching, and imaginative story.
I encourage readers to buy this one." -Novella Reviews
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Talisman, a pampered show dog with attitude, has a play date with her sister Maddie, who is a hardcore cowdog. Through an unfortunate mixup, the two dogs are switched and Talisman has to cowdog-up for the day.
It is an Australian Shepherd Freaky Friday!
A hilarious spinoff from the RED HOT series of comic chick lit novels, told from the dog's perspective.
A portion of the proceeds from this novella will be donated to www.AussieRescue.orgAn uplifting, inspiring tale for humans of all ages!
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"Show Dog Sings the Blues is hilarious, primal, endearing, and complex. If you have, or had, a pet that is more like an amazing family member, you will want to read Tali’s tale." -Pagan Culture
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| A Scene From This Canine Chick Lit Novella |
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Please enjoy a scene from SHOW DOG SINGS THE BLUES!
Prissy, pampered show dog Talisman has been dropped off for the day for a play date with her sister, Maddie.
Josh and Cheyenne are new ranch hands in charge for the day.
While avoiding a skunk, the two dogs have just fallen into a mud puddle.
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The mud all over me was totally gross. I crawled out of the puddle and found a nearby patch of damp grass where I sprawled and rolled. I snorted, snuffled, and squirmed, rubbing every inch of my body on the grass to try to wipe off the offending slime. Maddie sat down a few feet away, laughing at my frantic efforts. She didn't seem in the least bit bothered by her own icky condition.
I stood and shook, then dropped to the ground and squirmed some more. Tried as I might, it was useless. Where were your groomers when you really needed them? Cheyenne popped into my mind. I guessed she would at least give me a bath and rescue me from this awful predicament. Encouraged by the thought, I hightailed it back to the ranch house.
I raced as fast as I could, but the thick, sticky mess in my pantaloons seemed to slow me down. Just this morning they had been so lovely. Now, it felt like I was wearing a pair of those heavy leather chaps the cowboys wore. Ranch living certainly wasn't my style. Give me my pretty, pampered, perfectly poofed lifestyle anytime.
Maddie was right behind me. I glanced back at her and noticed she had my scarf in her mouth—it must have come off when I was slithering on the grass. As sisters went, Maddie was very thoughtful, but visiting her apparently involved far more danger than I bargained for. Perhaps this was something I should discuss in further detail with the pet psychic on my next visit.
The good news was that Cheyenne and Josh were waiting for us outside the ranch house. The bad news was that Cheyenne's scream was so high-pitched and shrill it actually caused me to yelp with pain.
"What have you two done?" Cheyenne sniffed the air. "You didn't get skunked, did you?"
I ran right up to her and sat obediently at her feet, waiting for the disgusting dilemma to be remedied. However, she looked past me at Maddie, who trotted up with my scarf still in her mouth.
Cheyenne snatched the scarf. "Like I don't already have enough work to do today. Come on Tali, let's get you prettied up again before they come to fetch you home." She grasped Maddie by the collar and started to drag her into the house.
Maddie and I shared panicked looks. I could tell that she was as horrified at the thought of being groomed as I was at the idea of not being groomed. Even with the mud, these humans should have been able to tell us apart.
I tried to follow Maddie, but Cheyenne pushed me away with her foot. "Get on, now. You've had your play time. We all need to do our chores."
No, no, no! I turned to Josh and raised my paw. Surely he would see the pink nail polish through the grime.
He furrowed his eyebrows and took my paw. "You gotta sticky-burr?" Carefully, he examined between my toes and pads and never even noticed Angelina's artistic masterpiece on my toenails. He let me go. "It's not there anymore, girl."
What was wrong with humans? Didn't they use their senses at all? How did they survive this long as a species?
I fought back my mounting fear. Certainly he could tell that my eyes were blue—Maddie had brown eyes. I batted them and gave him my most sincere look.
"You got something in your eye now?"
I batted my eyes faster.
He took a moment to look in each eye—each sky blue eye surrounded by stunning black eyeliner that made their beauty just pop out—and said, "Probably just some mud. I'll hose you down, and you'll feel better."
Hose me down? Gorgeous show dogs did not get hosed down. Show dogs were special. I posed in a classic stacked stance so he could see that I was a skilled show dog. As I stood square and still, watching him alertly, waiting for him to acknowledge my highly renowned conformation, he grabbed the hose and turned it on full blast.
Surely Josh was joshing.
When the blast of water hit me, some primal part of my brain took over and I howled. However, I wasn't howling for my wolfen ancestors. No. I was crying out to my show dog sisters for help: Spiritsong's Sassyfras Sodapop, Spiritsong's Strawberry Sundae, Spiritsong's Sweet Sundrop, hear my plaintive plea! Send my groomers! Dispatch my handlers! Sassy, Berry, Sunny...rescue me!
I was a show dog singing the blues.
"Criminy, Maddie, what's your beef?"
Josh's callous disregard for my anguish startled me into silence.
I closed my eyes, held my breath, battened down my ears, and waited for the world to end.
The water assaulted me without mercy, but somehow I survived.
When he turned off the hose, I sidled up to him and shook the water off me as furiously as I could manage. There was a certain measure of satisfaction I received from getting him wet.
Unfortunately, Josh seemed unfazed by the shower.
"Okay, it's time to get to work. It's just you and me today, and we got more chores than a rattlesnake can shake its tail at."
Did he say rattlesnake? Worse, did he say work? What did he expect me to do, pose pretty for the cows?
"We gotta feed, vaccinate, move stock. Come on, girl." Josh headed toward a nearby barn.
I had no idea how to handle this situation. Panic-stricken, I looked at the house. Maddie was in the window, her eyes wide with alarm. She was standing on hind legs, her sweaty paws marking the glass with evidence of her own fear. My mind reached out to hers. What do I do?
Don't hurt my ranch, Maddie managed to communicate before Cheyenne grasped a handful of scruff and pulled her away from the window.
"Maddie!" Josh's voice was impatient. "We're already runnin' behind."
Reluctantly, I trotted off toward him. God help us all, I thought. This isn't going to be pretty.
Copyright © 2011 - Devin O'Branagan - All Rights Reserved
Do not copy, but feel free to share a link to this page!
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| Scenes From The Red Hot Novels About Talisman! |
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| The Dog Show |
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| The Aussie & The Basset |
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Message From Devin to Dog Clubs and Rescue Organizations!
SHOW DOG SINGS THE BLUES is priced low so that others may use the books to raise money for their animal causes. There is no price printed on the book itself, so you may buy copies in bulk and sell them for a higher price at your functions. A portion of the money I earn will be donated to Aussie Rescue. Please use the books to earn money for your own cause as well. It would be my honor to help.
If you buy the books via my online bookstore, I will autograph them for you and "Talisman" can pawtograph them as well!
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